Blog #1: December 9, 2011 - 20 days 'til departure.
I don't really even know what to write, but I know that I need to get some of these feelings down on paper. I'm finally hitting "freak out mode" I think.
Yesterday, while at Paige and Brooke's school, I was in the office and asked if we needed to turn in any paperwork for withdrawal, etc. Patty just kindly looked at me and said, "no, I think we have everything we need." Here entered the "lip quiver" and the well of emotion that had been hiding all of this time. It picked a very unexpected time to play "peek-a-boo" if ya know what I'm sayin'! I had no idea that I would pick that moment to get emotional. I guess I just need to expect the randomness of Emotion's timing. (I decided to make Emotion a proper noun out of respect).
So mini-break down over, headed over to Max's, "Mother's Day Out" program where I had to ask the same question... here entered Emotion, once again. Not so random. Still unexpected.
Then while running errands .. Christmas shopping, I check my iPhone and see an email from Mark. He had purchased our airline tickets. Now, you'd THINK that I'd continue the lip-quivering tear fest -- but I DIDN'T. I got SO excited!! Who knew?? It was definitely refreshing to feel excitement and not panic or sadness.
So who knows how I'm feeling about this whole thing? I really don't have a solid answer. What I do know is that I'm all over the place .. and I don't want to become "Spiritual Sally" here, but I do want to acknowledge that I'm so grateful that God has me in the palm of his hand. His steady, solid, loving hand. Aaaaah ..I just love the peace here.
20 days .. and counting.